There are good days and bad ones for children when their parents are going through a divorce. One day your kids seem to be coping beautifully and you feel fully confident in your decision to move forward with your new future. The next day one of your kids can’t stop crying, is really angry and blaming you for ruining his/her life. And you wonder if things will ever get better. And then the next day, life is better. Or maybe it takes 3 days and then life gets better, for now.
This expression of your children’s emotional unevenness is not unexpected. Divorce is a process, for everyone involved, and some days will be worse/better than others, for everyone involved. You have the big talk where you break the news that you and co-parent will always be Mom and Dad but will no longer be Husband and Wife. You answer all the questions, reassure the kids the divorce is not their fault, and express your love for them. But this is not a one-and-done discussion. You then need to periodically check in with your kids to see how they are handling all the emotional and physical changes to the new family dynamics. You want to be aware if your kids start to have more bad days than good.
Many children need the support of a professional therapist to feel less alone and normalize the divorce process for them. Many adults find they need this professional support too. At Westfield Mediation, LLC we have a list of therapists in the area that can help either you or your children cope with the divorce. Divorce is one of the most stressful events in a person’s life. But in the grand scheme of things, it is a relatively short-term stressful period. And all of the family members can adjust to the new normal of their life and can live their post-divorce life in a much happier, healthier manner.
For more information about Divorce Mediation contact Randi M. Albert, JD, or Michelle Weinberg, LMFT, at Westfield Mediation, LLC, at 908.913.0373. View our website at www.westfieldnjmediation.com or email us at info@westfieldnjmediation.com
This expression of your children’s emotional unevenness is not unexpected. Divorce is a process, for everyone involved, and some days will be worse/better than others, for everyone involved. You have the big talk where you break the news that you and co-parent will always be Mom and Dad but will no longer be Husband and Wife. You answer all the questions, reassure the kids the divorce is not their fault, and express your love for them. But this is not a one-and-done discussion. You then need to periodically check in with your kids to see how they are handling all the emotional and physical changes to the new family dynamics. You want to be aware if your kids start to have more bad days than good.
Many children need the support of a professional therapist to feel less alone and normalize the divorce process for them. Many adults find they need this professional support too. At Westfield Mediation, LLC we have a list of therapists in the area that can help either you or your children cope with the divorce. Divorce is one of the most stressful events in a person’s life. But in the grand scheme of things, it is a relatively short-term stressful period. And all of the family members can adjust to the new normal of their life and can live their post-divorce life in a much happier, healthier manner.
For more information about Divorce Mediation contact Randi M. Albert, JD, or Michelle Weinberg, LMFT, at Westfield Mediation, LLC, at 908.913.0373. View our website at www.westfieldnjmediation.com or email us at info@westfieldnjmediation.com