There will never be the perfect time to tell the kids you are getting a divorce. At Westfield Mediation, LLC, we help clients navigate this journey. We have some dos and don’ts about how to tell the kids. It is best to sit down as a family and have both Mom and Dad tell all the kids at the same time, be available to answer any questions and reinforce that the kids are not to blame. Regardless of how you feel, it is also best not to blame one another or give nitty gritty details about the reason for the divorce, even if the kids ask. Some of the timing of when to tell your children about your divorce depends on their age and their understanding of the concept of time. A 15 year old can envision abstract time about the future much better than a 5 year old. So you don’t want to tell your 5 year old that you are moving out soon. You want to say that you are moving out on Saturday. You want to reassure your children that you love them, that this is not their fault and it is between Mom and Dad. It is because Mom and Dad don’t love each other anymore the way people who stay married need to love each other. So, Mom and Dad are getting a divorce and are going to live separately.
You want to explain to your children what will stay the same (attending the same school, having the same friends) and what will change (two homes- one where you spend time with Mom and another house where you spend time with Dad). You also want to be available to answer any questions your children may have during this conversation and in the future. Children may have lots of questions after they have had a chance to process all this information.
While there is no ideal time to have this conversation, if you are getting a divorce and have children, it is a conversation that must occur. Westfield Mediation, LLC, can offer you the support you need to make this happen.
For more information about Divorce Mediation contact Randi M. Albert, JD, or Michelle Weinberg, LMFT, at Westfield Mediation, LLC, at 908.913.0373. View our website at www.westfieldnjmediation.com or email us at info@westfieldnjmediation.com
You want to explain to your children what will stay the same (attending the same school, having the same friends) and what will change (two homes- one where you spend time with Mom and another house where you spend time with Dad). You also want to be available to answer any questions your children may have during this conversation and in the future. Children may have lots of questions after they have had a chance to process all this information.
While there is no ideal time to have this conversation, if you are getting a divorce and have children, it is a conversation that must occur. Westfield Mediation, LLC, can offer you the support you need to make this happen.
For more information about Divorce Mediation contact Randi M. Albert, JD, or Michelle Weinberg, LMFT, at Westfield Mediation, LLC, at 908.913.0373. View our website at www.westfieldnjmediation.com or email us at info@westfieldnjmediation.com
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