While divorce mediation costs you significantly less than if you litigated your divorce, it is not a free service.  And you must pay out of pocket.  You are not able to use health insurance to cover the cost or take it as a tax deduction on your tax returns.  There is a small caveat, according to Intuit, that if you are billed separately for any tax advice relative to the divorce, that amount may be a miscellaneous itemized deduction.  However, at Westfield Mediation, LLC, we always refer you to your tax accountant regarding tax advice.  We don’t pretend to know the complex, ever-changing, tax code and leave that to the experts to advise you accordingly. 

Divorce Mediation does not qualify as an expense covered by your health insurance because divorce is not a mental health diagnosis.  Insurance companies need that CPT/ICD code referring to the diagnosis to reimburse the provider.  Divorce is not a mental health issue and has no such code.  While many people going through a divorce experience mental health distress, s/he can go to a therapist to get the help s/he needs.  A therapist is covered by health insurance.  While a divorce mediator can be understanding of the distress you are experiencing, the mediator’s role is to help you plan for separate futures.  A therapist can offer you individualized support and help you develop better coping tools to deal with all the stress.  Health insurance covers the mental health piece but not the life planning piece of your life. 

While the cost of divorce mediation exists, it can be split between the couple.  So you are paying half for a full meeting.  When you litigate, you both pay full price x2, for you to have both of your lawyers do all of the talking to each other.  Lawyers can cost $300/hr and divorce mediation only $250/hr.  So, instead of it costing you $300/hr and your spouse $300/hr to both use your lawyers for a meeting, it can cost each of you $125/hr to directly communicate with one another in mediation.  While that is still not free, it is a bargain. 

For more information about Divorce Mediation contact Randi M. Albert, JD, or Michelle Weinberg, LMFT, at Westfield Mediation, LLC, at 908.913.0373.  View our website at www.westfieldnjmediation.com or email us at info@westfieldnjmediation.com
 
 

This past Sunday, The New York Times included an essay by a divorced mom who spent a week vacation with her ex-husband and their children.  She describes a magical time at the beach with respectful parents and happy kids. Hundreds of readers commented. Some said that the divorced couple is lucky that they have developed such a good post-divorce relationship that this trip was possible. Others argued that the joint vacation creates unhealthy confusion for their children who might be wishing that their parents would reconcile.

For me, the essay and the various responses reinforced what we have found as divorce mediators. Every family is different, and each family needs to create a future plan that works for them.

At Westfield Mediation, LLC, we work with divorcing couples to create parenting plans outlining where the children will be spending their time during the year – including the day-to-day plan as well as holidays. We talk about school, activities, vacations, college, and religion. Because children’s needs change over time, we include in the plan opportunities for the parents to meet and review and revise, when necessary. We also create financial plans for supporting the children over time.

During our sessions, we encourage parents to try to work together and to focus on the children’s interests when making these parenting decisions. Of course, not every couple will want to continue to vacation together after they are divorced.  But couples who can create a supportive, less argumentative relationship with each other will be doing what is best for their kids.

​For more information about parenting plans and divorce mediation, please contact Randi M. Albert, JD, or Michelle Weinberg, LMFT, at Westfield Mediation, LLC, at 908.913.0373.  View our website at www.westfieldnjmediation.com or email us at info@westfieldnjmediation.com