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when only one person is ready for divorce

2/17/2017

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Lately, I have heard from a lot of divorce mediation clients who are ready to get divorced, but whose spouses are not in the same place.  It is a pretty common scenario to have one spouse who wants to move on from the marriage, while the other wants to stay – either to try to fix things, or just to ride it out.

For divorce mediation to work, both spouses have to come in to work on the agreement.  So, how do you get both people to the table?  At Westfield Mediation, LLC, we explain that if one person wants a divorce, it is going to happen.  Even if one person files for divorce, and the other person refuses to respond in court, the case will still move forward – just without the input of the person who does not participate.  And since it’s going to happen, we suggest that both parties might as well work on the plans together through divorce mediation – a faster, less expensive, less stressful option.

In divorce mediation, couples work together to create plans for parenting, the division of assets and debts, alimony and child support. These are important decisions and it is best that each person contributes to the creation of the agreement.  By working together on a future plan, a divorcing couple ensures that the agreement will work for their family and that they are both invested in its success.

​For more information on divorce mediation,  please contact Randi M. Albert, JD, or Michelle Weinberg, LMFT, at Westfield Mediation, LLC, at 908.913.0373.  View our website at www.westfieldnjmediation.com or email us at info@westfieldnjmediation.com

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Studies show....divorce

2/3/2017

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Divorce mediation works for a lot of couples.  With the guidance of an impartial mediator, couples are able to come in for about 5 meetings, sit in the same room, and have direct conversations with one another while making decisions about their new futures.  This process helps couples have a base for a workable level of communication post-divorce.  If you are co-parenting then you will still have to communicate on a regular basis with your ex. 

Studies have shown that this type of positive post-divorce relationship is what is best for the kids.  It does not seem to matter whether kids live with married or divorced parents.  What does seem to matter is the level of conflict between the parents.  So if parents are married and there is conflict or parents are divorced and there is conflict, the children are negatively affected.  If parents are married and there is little conflict or parents are divorced and there is little conflict, the children are able to cope. 
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Studies have also shown that the more involved both parents are on a regular basis in the lives of a child, the better.  Children can thrive during a divorce with both parents active in his/her life.   The mediation process at Westfield Mediation, LLC, helps you build a foundation to have an active role in your child’s life.  Strength builds upon strength.  If you end your marriage in a healthy manner, you are more easily able to transition to a strong post-divorce relationship with your co-parent.  This is beneficial to you and your children. 

Studies also show that the parties who participate in divorce mediation are more likely to follow through with the decisions made in mediation, most likely because each had input into these decisions.  So couples who participate in mediation are less likely to have to return to court post-divorce to change any of the divorce agreement. 

For more information about divorce mediation contact Randi M. Albert, JD, or Michelle Weinberg, LMFT, at Westfield Mediation, LLC, at 908.913.0373.  View our website at www.westfieldnjmediation.com or email us at info@westfieldnjmediation.com.
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    Authors

    Michelle Weinberg, M.Ed.,LMFT, is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with many years of experience working with couples.

    Randi M. Albert, JD, is an attorney with experience in family law and public service.

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